I guess I am really a fire cracker. DB said I am one fiery one. I’m mighty hot-tempered. My fuse is so short, it can explode within seconds and my patience is, you know the answer.
I am the above because that’s what my “mentor” said about me, too. Not just DB, my mentor said I’m super short fused; a friend of mine, who is a Filipino, said the same thing. Outsiders are the best judges.
When I think about all these – about my fiery temper, I do feel bad. Can I say I take on my mom since I looks and acts like her so much? Come to think of it, my dad was a hot-tempered person, too, when I was younger. He has since mellowed so much from the days I was still in school to the day I left the family home 11 years ago.
The funny thing is all of them said if I had a kid, it would tame me hell a lot. I don’t think so, I told each of them. The kid would be dead before he/she could see the world. DB, of course, said “That would not happen with me around” and he gave me that killer look.
The best was this conversation I had with my “mentor”. She said I should have a kid to change my perspective in life, I will be smarter, I won’t take things for granted, my don’t-give-a-damn-attitude will change to the opposite, learn to care for others, and I will learn to accept patience.
Maybe it’s true it will change me but for now, I’m just gonna try lengthening the fuse a little at a time. My “mentor” asked me this question since she knows I have no relatives in this country. ”Aren’t you afraid to be alone when DB’s gone, who’s gonna take care of you?” I told her, I don’t know the answers to her these questions. Probably I will leave it into God’s hands.
Right now, I will take care of my imperfections first.